In North Berkeley, along Shattuck, stretches the collection of fancy shops, nice restaurants and upscale knickknackeries known as Gourmet Ghetto. On a normal, sunny day, the patrons of the Cheeseboard Collective will populate the grassy median of this busy road, to gobble down their high quality vegetarian organic superpizza. Even the signs they have conquered, to spell their minds.

Just across the street is Chez Panisse, the legendary and legendarily expensive upper crust cafe. Someday I will go there, to their downstairs section, where things are more moderately priced and a tad less glam.

In the meantime, I’ll get my lunch at Jimmy Beans in Haas business school, a greasy Cajun chicken sandwich with a bit of Cesar salad. And while I’m in the throng of overdressed nasties waiting for my grub, I’ll hear one of them answering the rhetorical howareyou with “Pretty well. Our clients just took us out for lunch to Chez Panisse and served some Champagne. They’re pretty cool.”

Not that I really think I’m in the wrong business, but am I?

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Nacht, aussen. Buntes Licht im Schee. Sirene.

Lautsprecherstimme: Get out of the traffic and park your car.

Ein Schnauzbartträger steigt aus der Highway Patrol Wagen. Der virtuelle Schnauzträger am Steuer des gestoppten Wagens lässt die Scheibe runter.

Schnauz: Get out of your car. You know why you got pulled over? For speeding. I need your license.
virtueller Schnauz: steigt aus. Speeding? Händigt den Führerschein aus.
S: scharf That’s what I said. I didn’t stutter. Sit on the passenger side.
V: schluckt, steigt ein
S: Where are you headed?
V: The Bay Area.
S: Do you have any idea what the speed limit is on this road under chain conditions?
V: Err.
S: It’s obvious you don’t, you don’t give a damn. What do you think the speed limit might be?
V: Well, I thought it would be whatever is reasonable to drive under these conditions.
S: You think it might be 65?
V: schaut aus dem Fenster, wo ein Schild mit einer 65 drauf am Strassenrand steht, wittert die Falle. No.
S: Have you ever been an officer?
V: ?
S: schärfer Have you ever been an officer?
V: No.
S: Well, I have been an officer for 23 years. Have you been at the site of an accident?
V: Err. No.
S: I have been. I have seen cars like yours tipped over. How fast were you going just now.
V: Err, probably something like…
S: 52 maybe?
V: Err.
S: Do you think you might have been going 52 miles an hour?
V: I guess so.
S: Would you be surprised if I told you that the speedlimit on this road is 30 miles an hour right now?
V: gulp
S: That’s right. Did you see me driving along at 40 miles?
V: kleinlaut Yes.
S: Did that make you think?
V: unverständlich
S: When I was flashing my lights at you? Did that give you any ideas?
V: stammelnd Err, I didn’t, wasn’t, I thought, err. No.
S: Nickt zufrieden That’s quite obvious. You know why we close this road? It’s because of people like you in big SUVs, who think they are safe. Caltrans wanted us to reopen the pass, because it has been closed for so long.
V: guckt wie ein Schaf I didn’t see any signs.
S: nickt grimmig Yes, they’re all snowed over. pausiert kurz If I gave you a ticket not, it’s for dangerous driving. That’s 300 dollars.
V: guckt wie eine Schafherde
S: Did I make a point?
V: Mäh!
S: Excuse me?
V: Yes. A whole bunch of points, actually.
S: I hope so. We don’t want to see you hurt, or your lady, or other people. Gibt den Führerschein zurück. Obey the speedlimit.
V: Yes. I will. Have a good night. Steigt aus und stapft durch den Schnee zurück zum SUV.

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snow
Originally uploaded by Genista.

A slightly mysterious view of the bubble snow flakes on top of a sunshade. don’t do this at home.

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heat, closer
Originally uploaded by Genista.

When asked about the strangeness of gas heaters in many houses in an area that is prone to earthquakes, and in a city that has already burned down a few times, she said: It’s a problem.

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At the Bay Street Mall in Emeryville they were having a seasonal attraction: white foam was blown from the roof in tiny patches, looking entirely like snow in the light of the streetlamps. Until it landed on chairs, tables and customers clothing, when it looked like foam again. I’d like to think that the kids who were taken there now believe that snow is made from soap and falls from the roof of stores. But with all the TV they are watching, they of course are well aware that snow comes from Columbia and is bad for your septum.

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Es ist kalt und windig, wie im November. Durch die spiegelverkehte Werbung für ein 99 cent-Sandwich behalte ich mein Rad im Auge. Eine junge Frau neben mir scherzt mit einer Freundin, in Zeitlupe, als Klischee, sehe ich den Getränkebecher auf ihrem Tablett kippen und fallen, die Tonspur setzt aus, beim Aufschlag höre ich einen Hall. Jedesmal wenn ich ins Leben blicke, kommt es wie schlechtes, dummes Kino heraus. Die Angestellte wiederholt meine Bestellung Stück für Stück, sie hat alles verstanden, sucht dennoch meine Zustimmung. 200 Dollar und fünf Cent tippt sie in die Kasse, 194 soll ich zurückbekommen. Sie stutzt kurz, dann läuft sie nach hinten und kommt mit einem Taschenrechner wieder. Routiniert jede ihrer Bewegungen, während sie mein tatsächliches Wechselgeld, 14 Dollar, berechnet und mir auszahlt. Neben mir steht eine Frau mit ihrem Kind in der Colalache, ich will etwas sagen, aber sie hat es schon bemerkt. Zwei junge Männer verdecken die Sicht auf mein Rad. Bin ich paranoid?

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