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He is one of the Clueless, an ancient family of mysteriously inept entities that think they rule the multiverse. When his sister Futility goes missing during her summer project to square the circles of hell, the distraught Fanboy assembles an imaginary team of his greatest heroes, and leads this Fellowship on the quest to try and save Futility from, like, whatever.

Fanboy starts the quest in a bar, planning to make friends and thus collect information about Futility. Things seem to be going comparatively well, until Fanboy’s younger twin brothers Fart and Fondle show up unexpectedly, and the evening quickly deteriorates.

The following morning, when Fanboy wakes up in an unfamiliar apartment clearly belonging to a female, he knows he really is in trouble. Then strange noises are coming from the kitchen.

And so it begins.

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